


Temporary Fix

by Lyval



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-29 00:57:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19819240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyval/pseuds/Lyval
Summary: Ryan is confused with feelings (and tipsy) and Shane helps him through it“Ryan, you can call me when you cant sleep, when youre lonely, when you have to get rid of a body, whatever it is. I'll be your temporary fix. It can be 3 am, and there would be nothing stopping me from driving to you and getting rid of whatever problem you have. I'm there for you. Even if its just for one night. We'll call it how you want“





	Temporary Fix

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, this is my fic which was supposed to contain smut but oh well, a little bit of story cant hurt.  
> English is not my first language so oversee em my dear fellow Shaniacs and Boogaras!
> 
> I hope you enjoy ^^

Ryan Bergara drove down the boulevard with shaking hands and tears in his eyes, every two seconds glancing at his peaceful phone lying in the car seat next to him. He could call anytime, anytime, anytime, was what his half-drunk head repeated endlessly ever since he had stormed out of his and Mariellas apartment. There was no shame in seeking the help of a friend. Only one call.

He averted his nervous eyes from the phone and turned into a small street, where he knew a rather good bar was located. He could take care of himself, no need to scream to the world how weak he was at the smallest occurence. 

Getting out of the car and locking it with wobbly hands, he walked into the bar with the bright neon signs, loud music and dull laughter, only wanting to forget. A few people looked at him curiously, all alone and drowsily stumbling into a little bar at 2 am, swollen red eyes and nervous stare. Ryan bit his tongue and asked the bartender for a beer, who didnt seem to care for his condition at all. 

Taking big chugs of it at once his eyes once more wandered to his phone, secure in his left pocket. Ready to call anyone. Of course, there would only be one he could actually call. He would call, anyway. Who would always be there for him, no matter what.

His mind wandered off to an evening some time ago now, in a small town in West Virginia, where he and his coworker Shane had tried to prove the existence of a specimen called “The Mothman“. It had been a rather funny investigation, thinking back to other not-so-funny occasions where lamps flickered in demon houses and ghostly-sounding responses were picked up by his EVP after Shane taunted the spirits. One of these nights, Shane would get them both killed. 

On that evening, after a long day of shooting, they had settled in a pub nearby their hotel. Ryan had been tired at first, but Shanes gleeful mood had lifted up his own in a matter of minutes, resulting in a long night of talking, laughing, and alcohol. After one or two beers, the boundaries that they usually respected were becoming pointless in their eyes and they became much more carefree, talking about god and the world, shuffling closer together on the old wooden bench, and even brushing small strands of the others hair behind their ear.

All in all, it was one of Ryans favourite evenings, if not his favourite, but he didnt remember much more of that night really. But what he did remember was that one conversation, as they stumbled into their room, laughing still and falling onto their beds, not so drunk anymore. The cold air sobered them up, and as they got ready for bed, smiling brightly, Shane cleared his throat, but in a manner that was a little out of character. You may ask “How can one clear ones throat and appear out of character by the way one does it?“, which is a totally valid question, but Ryan couldnt find an answer to that. It just was, he felt it, and thats what struck him. Thats what showed him how strong their bond had become through their show, thats what made him turn around to look at the taller man standing in his bordeaux tshirt and boxers in a totally new light. 

Shane had stood there, staring back, suddenly serious.  
“Ryan“, he had said, eyes softer than usual, “You know I'm always there for you. Whenever you need me, at any time, give me a call and I'll come around“  
They had looked at each other, until Ryan had laughed awkwardly and shrugged it off with a “Yeah sure, Shane“.

But as he rolled to his side on his bed, slight snoring coming from Shanes bed already, his mind was overflowing, bubbling up emotions he couldnt let himself have, resulting in pain and anger over himself for not answering Shane accordingly in that situation, and for turning Shanes nice offer into things he didnt meant in his head, and he felt bad for feeling bad after something Shane had said out of pure niceness.

After that followed confusion, and hope, and selfpity.

And after that, the morning arrived, and Shane had smiled and wished him a good morning, and they had packed up their things and flew back to California, and this time Ryan didnt let himself fall asleep and drift onto Shanes shoulder during sleep like so often, regardless of the bags under his eyes, and he had felt bad about himself, and they had gone back to Buzzfeed and he had started working on a new cold case while Shane had been answering emails, and that was that.

Weeks later, Ryans family's dog had died, and even though he always tried looking like a jacked strong man, he was a tiny sensitive man, and worst of all, Shane knew that. So naturally, when Ryan arrived at Buzzfeed that day, reddened eyes and no motivation whatsoever, Shane had taken him into a room away from the others with Starbucks coffee and sat him down to talk. That talk ended with Ryan sobbing into Shanes chest in a tiny closet while Shane rubbed his back soothingly.

And after that, Ryan didnt seem to like Shanes girlfriend that much anymore.  
He didnt know what was going on, or what Sara had done to make him despise her, but he knew he had to stop getting invested into.. his friend. Into that enourmous mountain of a man with sloppy limbs and droopy eyes who mocked every supernatural entity in the whole of America while very possibly being a fucking demon himself. And as he continued thinking about the bad attributes Shane Alexander Madej had to offer, he slowly realised that he had fallen for him.

Now, that was months ago, seasons ago, investigations ago. Time didnt help, Ryan started to realise that, and his girlfriend had started to become frustrated by the lack of attention he gave her, and she wasnt wrong. He had had a bad fight with her and had sat in his car, sorry for his situation and sorry for his girlfriend. He couldnt go on like that. All he did was lie. He had turned their relationship into a lie. And after all, he even liked her still, which made things even worse because he longed for somebody else he couldnt have, while having someone he loved, but apparently that was not enough. And she didnt even know.

He had looked at his phone, one, two, three, fivethousand times. Even stared at Shanes phonenumber. He needed him here, talking soothingly, smiling, anything. He couldnt let himself have that.

So when he walked into Buzzfeed after a long weekend, trying to get a video cut, Shane slid into the audioroom and symbolised Ryan to take off the headphones. Ryan thought he had been good in covering up his mental state today, but Shanes face told him differently.

“You know, I can see that you're upset about something. Dont try to deny it, Bergara. Mind me sitting here?“  
He pointed at the empty chair, and Ryan shook his head. Damn that giant.

“So I'm not gonna say I'm sad about you not phoning me, but I am sad. When you didnt write at all this weekend, I thought maybe you were doing a detox cure with Mariella or you lost your phone. Now I see you've been avoiding to call me. Why?“

Ryan sighed.  
“Shane, this really isnt your problem. I'm a grown up, I can handle small breakdowns“

“You cant, and we both know that“  
It was meant funny, but they couldnt laugh. Shane nudged Ryans shoulder.

“Man, do you wanna talk now? How about we waste some work time?“

Ryan knew he couldnt tell him. But shrugging Shane off was also no use, because he wouldnt go. Stubborn bastard.

“I value your company, and your ear, but this is something personal. ..I had a fight with Mariella“

“Oh. Im so sorry for you...Was it bad?“  
Ryan nodded slowly.  
“But calling you was no use, I mean, what could YOU have done?“  
Ryan laughed uncomfortably, and regretted his words on an instant when he saw Shanes face.

“A lot Im sure“, he said slowly. Ryan looked down.

“Hey, you remember Mothman? That evening in that small rainy town? Eating that moth-pizza?“  
Ryan nodded.

“Do you remember what I said about you calling me whenever you need me? I meant it. Deeply, from the dark pits of my heart“

Ryan looked up into Shanes eyes. He knew funny Shane, mocking Shane, pissed off Shane, grumpy Shane, happy Shane, demon-taunting Shane, suicidal Shane, but serious Shane was something new.  
“I'm sorry“, Ryan said, meaning it.

“Ryan, you can call me when you cant sleep, when youre lonely, when you have to get rid of a body, whatever it is. I'll be your temporary fix. It can be 3 am, and there would be nothing stopping me from driving to you and getting rid of whatever problem you have. I'm there for you. Even if its just for one night. We'll call it how you want“

These where the words echoing through Ryans head when he finished his beer in that small bar, and he fished for his phone.  
Hesitatingly, he tipped Shanes name in. The number glared at him.

“Whenever you need me, I'll be there“

He could be his temporary fix. Only for this evening.

“We'll call it how you want“

Ryan breathed in, breathed out, and pressed “call“.  
The phone beeped. He put it on his ear.

It rang quite a while until a sleepy sounding Shane answered.

“Ryan“  
“Shane“, Ryan gulped, something burning in his stomach.

“Do you need me? Where are you?“  
Shane already sounded much more awake.

“Im.. yes“, was all Ryan could say. He heard Shane stumbling out of bed and felt bad.

“Where are you, Ry?“

Ryan tried holding it together and named the address.  
“I'm there in five minutes, dont worry“

Shane hang up. 

Five minutes later, Shane stumbled into the bar. He was wearing a grey hastily put on tshirt, wide jeans and their matching ghoul-hunting shoes, and his hair was nothing short of a mess. Seeing him like that, worried eyes, sleepy face, made his stomach burn again, but this time he liked the sensation.

“Ryan, are you okay?“  
Ryan nodded as Shane hurried to sit him down in a booth.  
“Youre not“  
“I am now“

Shane brushed Ryans messy hair away.

“Im glad you called“  
“Im glad too“, Ryan admitted.

Looking at him in the past had hurt Ryan, shown him all his dreams, created and killed all his hopes. Now, the sting was gone. 

“Do you want to talk?“  
Ryan shook his head.  
“But I should anyway“

Shane nodded and waited. Ryan felt tears forming in the corner of his eyes, but this time he didnt care.  
And he told him. Of his fights with Mariella in the past, of his struggle in finding out what he truly wants, of him thinking he is selfish with every act he does which kills him inside and of that sting that appeared in West Virginia, on that night where he lost his sleep. And Shane listened patiently.

“Shane, I might.. I might not love Mariella that way anymore“

Shane nodded.  
“Thats okay, people often lose each other over time“

“No, I mean.. I'm questioning..“  
Ryan was unable to form the words. He could stop now. He told him about the fights, about the fight today, a good enough reason to strand here tipsy at 2 am. But then he would start lying to Shane, too. He wouldnt do that again.

“I dont think Im straight“, he said, watching Shanes face. He didnt look shocked, or mad, or afraid, or whatever Ryans nightmares had predicted him. He smiled.

“Thats alright. Nothing bad about liking men.  
I can see why you were so confused, it must be hard realising things you never thought would apply to you are actually true. Your relationship with Mariella taught you that, so dont feel bad about it, it was something good“

Ryans full body was prickling. Now or never, Bergara.  
“Shane, I found out because of you“

Now Shane seemed surprised. It was too late now, Ryan had to stand for his words. He had to live through this.

“Through me? How?“, he said calmly.  
“I.. you..“  
Calm, Ryan. Calm yourself.

“You are the first man I was ever interested in“

Shane smiled joyous.  
“Me? Man, I take that as a compliment. You liked me so much that it troubled you over half a year, resulting in a breakup with your girlfriend? You should have told me right away“

Ryan wanted to say something, but Shane was already leaning in, pressing his lips softly against Ryans. Ryan didnt know what to do, Shane held Ryans face in his hands tenderly, and two seconds later they were apart again, Ryan furiously blushing. Shane smiled.

“That wasnt so bad, was it?“, he asked, trying to catch Ryans eyes.

Ryans head was ready to rush into confusion, but he didnt let himself. He could take it. It was a soft small absolutely beautiful kiss, all he ever wanted, and he could live with this. Nevermind Shanes intention, nevermind all the things he had to consider now. All he did was smile at Shane, and Shane smiled back.  
They ordered drinks, and talked about something else, anything and everything at all, just like that night in West Virginia, not caring that it was a tuesday night and work was waiting for them in less than 6 hours.

At around 4:30 am, they took a cab to Shanes place, a bit drunk and laughing, and Shane kept stroking Ryans cheek or leg, and it was good. 

And as they walked into Shanes apartment, balancing each other, they felt that this was the beginning of something beautiful.


End file.
